A Word From Me Today
October 11 - The first time someone told me healing wasn’t linear it was like a bomb went off inside my head. It was revolutionary for me. It meant that every little time I wasn’t doing well wasn’t a setback. I could still be moving forward and have a bad day. This was a game changer for me. I hope it helps you, too.
August 17 - It’s the first day of school for my youngest son today. Eighth grade. Last year was rough on him. Hoping he has a better year this year. He very begrudgingly let me take a picture.
June 19 - I love Facebook memories because they remind me of things I couldn’t possibly keep track of on my own. Like the fact that my son had his high school graduation a year ago today, or that one year ago today was the last day I had in Florida before we moved to Texas. I can’t believe it’s been a year. My heart still hurts. Have you ever had to leave something behind that you loved so dearly? How long does it take for the pain of it to go away? I’m still waiting…
June 13 - I’ve been feeling really down lately. I just can’t shake this depression. My energy is so low and my interest in doing things is absent. I know what this is and I know it will pass, but still, it’s hard to get through. Some days, I feel like I’m moving through quicksand. I feel zapped of all my joy. Praying it returns quickly. Hope you’re well. Peace. - Mel
May 17 - I’m sad today. I miss someone who was once a huge part of my life. Saying goodbye to her was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life. I’ve never known anyone like her. When I think of her, I try to think of how blessed I am to have had her in my life instead of being sad that we had to say goodbye. It’s tough. There is a gaping hole in my life where she used to be.
March 28 - Somedays I’m just a mess. Today seems to be one of those days. I need to have some grace for myself instead of telling myself how pathetic I am, which is what I’ve been doing. Geez. Why are we so hard on ourselves? Hope you have grace for yourself today. - Mel
March 4 - Just about every morning I spend time reading in my Bible and praying, but this morning I spent a little extra time with Jesus. It always does my heart good.
February 28 - everyone needs a BFF...
February 26 - sometimes you have to take an airport selfie with your son. Headed to Philly for the weekend! Much needed friend time ahead!
February 21 - Does joy ever escape you? Not happiness, but joy. Sometimes I just can’t find it. Most of the time, in fact. I have this desire to be with Jesus that leaves me restless and lonely. I wonder if anyone else feels the same way. I wish I could explain it better. Maybe you know what I mean and you have better words for it. I know this world is not my home, but I’d like to feel some joy while I’m here. And I think Jesus would want that for me, as well. So that’s my goal. How ‘bout you? - Mel
January 28 - Wow! It’s been a long time since I’ve dropped in and said hello. I’ve been in a funk, honestly. It happens. Here’s what’s on my mind today: Do you ever just feel like an imposter? Like a fraud? Like if someone snooped around long enough they would discover that you’ve been faking your way through (fill in the blank) the whole time? IMPOSTER SYNDROME!!! Dude. It’s strong right now with me. Anyone else? I’m sure I’ll end up blogging about it soon. If you’re feeling this way, you’re not alone! Hang in there! Peace.
November 9 - What do you need to change in your life to start making things better for yourself?
October 9 - I got this photo from a friend today. It was the perfect thing for me to hear this morning. She always knows the right thing to say. Do you have a friend like that? Someone who knows the real you and loves you anyway? Someone who doesn’t judge you? You need a friend like that. Maybe even a few friends like that. I have a few and I cherish each of them. Hope you do, too! - Mel
September 11 - Are you ever just sad? I mean really sad deep in your soul? I wrote about that today. Check it out! - Mel
September 5 - Well, it’s another 5:00 am wake-up for me. Funny thing is I feel better when I sleep less. Anyone else? Check out my latest blog to read more about it! Peace! - Mel
September 2 - Wow! It’s been a minute since I’ve been here. The whole world seems to have gone haywire. And my life has been turned upside down for a few months. We recently moved. It was a rough move. I’ve written about it several times on my blog. So many emotions tied into it for me. Shocker! Me, with the big emotions. Having a hard time working through them, if I’m being honest. A friend sent me this today, and it’s so true.
March 23 - I find myself wanting to write but not able to at the same time. I’m very restless and irritable. It feels as if the whole world is falling apart. How about you? How are you feeling?
February 27 - I have posted some new and some old blog posts that I would love for you to read. They are real and they are raw. They are about suicide. It’s a topic we need to be talking about. It’s important. I’m scared to share my story, if I’m being completely transparent, but I know that’s what God wants me to do, so I will. Head on over to my blog and check it out. Www.iampolarized.com - Mel
February 19 - Do you ever feel like God is telling you to do something, but it doesn’t quite make sense? It sort of makes sense, but then you start doing it and you start to think God has lost His mind a little? Well, I know God is telling me to share my story, and it seems that He wants me to write a book. I mean, maybe. Unless I’m hearing Him wrong. If so, I’m sure He’ll let me know! Anyhow, so I’m writing and wondering how in the world anyone is going to find this stuff interesting. You know what I mean? Alas, I will keep writing until I’m told to stop. Anyone feel me? Hey, if you’re reading this, leave me a message! I’d love to hear from you!! - Mel
February 6 - Today has just already been a day and it’s 11:20 am. Sitting at a friend’s desk, I see this little card that I gave her a while back. After praying and telling God that I really need to hear from Him, I look up and there it is. Though the way looks bleak right now, He always provides for the road up ahead. - peace
January 26 - Sometimes you just have to be silly and take some selfies. It doesn’t matter that I’m 43 and have wrinkles. Go have some fun! Take pictures of yourselves. And post them somewhere!! Peace.
January 16 - I cried as I put my makeup on this morning. Head over to my blog to read the full story. - Mel

​January 2 - HAPPY NEW YEAR!! I’ve posted several new blogs. Head on over to beautifullypolarized.com and check it out!!

​December 30 - I’ve been on a pendulum lately. I swing back and forth between feeling great, and feeling very low - just like any good bipolar should, I suppose. Sigh. I’m exhausted. It’s Group night. Have I told y’all that I lead a group? Well, I do. And it’ll be that time in about ten minutes. And I don’t feel like leading tonight. But, that’s just how this thing goes. Tonight - Emotion Regulation. Time for me to regulate myself so I can do what I need to do! Until next time. - Mel

​December 12 - Big day today! My daughter came home from Europe, and I found out my first article was published in StayWhole Magazine! Check it out!
December 6 - Stay tuned to hear all about my latest adventures in getting my brain scanned! Such a cool experience, and I can’t wait to tell you all about it!! - Mel

November 29 - I experienced something in the last few days that was rather strange. I felt - um, what’s the word?? - NORMAL. What in the world? Not too high. Not too low. Not up, not down. I didn’t want to cry, nor bounce. I just felt right, like I was perfectly as I am supposed to be. And I didn’t know what do to with it. It didn’t last long, but that’s ok. It happened, and that’s what matters to me right now. I haven’t had that normal feeling in so long that I had forgotten what it actually felt like. But now I know it’s still possible. So, until the next normal - Mel

November 22 - I’m feeling manic today. It's the bubbly, happy, feel-good kind of hypomania that we all think of when we think of mania. I like it! Well, mostly. I've been energetic. Bouncy. I've been pressure washing the fence in the backyard! Getting stuff done, right? And I've jammed out to some of my favorite songs today. I love music, and I never enjoy it more than when I'm feeling really up. But there is a down side to all of this, too. I drive too fast, and have to really work to keep that under control. And I am NEVER NOT HUNGRY. Good grief! I can't stop eating today. What is that about????? Someone help me! And as the day wears on, I am beginning to get more and more restless and agitated. The euphoria is wearing off, and the icky stuff is settling in, maybe. We are about to go have dinner with friends, so I'm hoping I can stave off the grouchies for a bit longer, and savor the fun just a little more. Wish me luck! - Mel